Spiritual Development Versus Spiritually Developed.

As you grow in true spiritual power and understanding you will actually find that many outer rules and regulations will become unnecessary; but this will be because you have really risen above them; never, never, because you have fallen below them. This point in your development, where your understanding of Truth enables you to dispense with certain outer props and regulations, is the Spiritual Coming of Age. When you really are no longer spiritually a minor, you will cease to need some of the outer observances that formerly seemed indispensable; but your resulting life will be purer, truer, freer, and less selfish than it was before; and that is the test.” 

― Emmet Fox, the Sermon on the Mount: The Key to Success in Life

What is spirituality?

Spirituality has many definitions, but at its core spirituality helps to give meaning to our lives. It's not necessarily connected to a specific belief system or even religious worship. Instead, it arises from your connection with yourself and with others, the development of your personal value system, and your search for meaning in life and inner peace in your life.

In my work with individuals, women and children I have come to realize how not only are some of my clients seem to present with developmental spiritually delay. The aforementioned maybe a misnomer as I refuse to believe there are individuals walking the face of the earth in human form with the inability to reach their innate spiritual nature. Their spiritual nature is within, there cannot be a circumventing of nor an inability of connecting with one spiritual nature. There are varying degrees of a lack of spiritual strength, deficiency of endurance and spiritual depletion. 

People “want they want when they want it.” The ego says “I want it now”. The principle of discovering is that learning is easy when the student is open. Understanding about spirituality is easy if, or hopefully when, the person is open not only to self-examination but practicing what is examined. With focused determination it is possible to fulfill ones desires, goals and objectives. 

There is, however, valuable lessons in learning to accept that we don’t always get what we want, yet in most if not all cases, get what we need. Spiritual development is the process of growing the intrinsic human capacity for self-transcendence or to grow into one’s greatness. The Self is embedded in something greater than the self, including the sacred. It is the developmental “engine” that propels the search for connectedness, meaning, purpose, and contribution. 

An examination of spiritual development may be particularly suitable to child and adolescent development. Issues of meaning, purpose, vocation, relationships, and identity are particularly significant during adolescence, and many observers note that major identity transformations occur during these years. 

What are the forms of spirituality that emerge in childhood? How might evolving systems and perspectives add richness and flexibility to examples of spiritual development among children and adolescents? How do environmental settings, particularly family, shape progress? How does the child or teen enlighten her or his own spiritual development?

The following may be a helpful example: 

“As a classically trained analyst, Coles was initially concerned with the illusionary quality of religion, but over time his conceptualizations were transformed as he noted with surprise the positive and sometimes life-changing quality of children’s spirituality. After witnessing how children’s religious beliefs and experiences helped them cope with racial discrimination and transform civic culture during the civil rights era in the South, he wrote, “whether our emphasis is sociological or psychological or theological,... even the most private ‘illusions’ can become part of a decidedly public event” (Coles, 1990, p. 20). His phenomenological approach to understanding child spirituality brought a deep quality of respect and illumination to the complex spiritual lives of children.”

                                           Discovering your spirituality

Discovering your spirituality can lead to a clearer life purpose, and better personal relationships.  Uncovering your spirituality may take some self-discovery. Here are some questions to ask yourself to discover what experiences and values define you:

1) What are your important relationships?

2) What do you value most in your life?

3) What people give you a sense of community?

4) What inspires you and gives you hope?

5) What brings you joy?

6) What are your proudest achievements?

The answers to such questions help you identify the most important people and experiences in your life. With this information, you can focus your search for spirituality on the relationships and activities in life that have helped define you as a person and those that continue to inspire your personal growth. 

 

Spiritually Developed

Spiritual Development is a process. Spiritual Development begins with an experience which is, in reality, a growth promoting experience. The growth promoting experience can be disappointment, grief and loss, death of a loved one, health prognosis, financial difficulties, child rearing, infidelity, incarceration, homelessness, childhood sexual trauma, negative external stimuli, and or another growth provoking situation. We, however, misunderstand our capacity for growth and enlightenment. Becoming Spiritually Developed by cultivating your spirituality may help uncover what's most meaningful in your life. By clarifying what's most important, you can focus less on the unimportant things. 

Spiritually Developed communities seeks to remove those things that suppress the expression of individual and collective empowerment.  A Spiritually Developed community includes such excellent values as benevolence, humanism, integrity, justice, mutuality, receptivity, respect, responsibility and trust. Spirituality initiates the process of becoming spiritually developed-- to look within ourselves for our True self.

1) Do we ever become spiritually developed? Yes. 

2) How long does it take to become Spiritually Developed? It may only take one yet this depends upon how many life cycles it takes to complete learned lessons which results in an evolved spiritual soul.

3) Is there a desired number of life cycles to learn all lessons? Yes, preferably one.

4) How many life cycles or lifetimes does it take to become spiritually developed? It depends on your willingness to practice learned lessons and their set principles. 

5) Is it possible to become spiritually developed learning all lessons in one life cycle? Anything is possible, yet usually it’s not the case.

Do men and women actually express different degrees of spirituality? Or do the differences reflect underlying definitions of spirituality and study items that appeal primarily to women? As notions of spirituality become increasingly embedded within popular culture, do women feel inclined to say that they are spiritual and compassionate because they believe that these are qualities they should approve? Likewise, do men hesitate to describe themselves in such a way because of the societal pressures and expectations they do or do not face?  Maybe the following verses may shed insight on how our community may view men and spirituality…

The Strength of a Man.

The strength of a man isn't seen in the width 

of his shoulders. It's seen in the width

of his arms that circle you.

The strength of a man isn't in the deep tone 

of his voice. It's in the gentle 

words he whispers...

The strength of a man isn't how many buddies he has. 

It's how good a buddy he is with his kids...

The strength of a man isn't in how respected he is at work. 

It's in how respected he is at home...

The strength of a man isn't in how hard he hits. 

It's in how tender he touches...

The strength of a man isn't in the hair on his chest. 

It's in his Heart that lies within his chest...

The strength of a man isn't how many women he's loved.

It's in can he be true to one woman...

The strength of a man isn't in the weight he can lift.

It's in the burdens he can carry...

Jacqueline Marie Griffiths

Bibliography

http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/stress-relief/art-20044464

http://www.sapphyr.net/women/strengthofman.htm

Fox, Emmett, (1938)

            The Sermon on the Mount quotes

            The Keys to Success in Life 

Griffiths, Jacqueline Marie (1999, July 15)

    © The Strength of a Man

     Scorpiox2x@aol.com

Hay, D., Nye, R., & Murphy, R. (1996). 

Thinking about childhood spirituality: Review of research and current directions. In L. J. Francis,    W. K. Kay, & W. S. Campbell (Eds.),

      Research in religious education (pp. 47–71). Macon, GA: Smyth & Helwys.

Helminiak, D. A. (1987). 

     Spiritual development: An interdisciplinary study. 

     Chicago: Loyola University Press.

Pictorial images

     Courtesy of Google images©

Piedmont, R. L. (1999).

     Does spirituality represent the sixth factor of personality? 

     Spiritual transcendence and the five-factor model. Journal of Personality,

     67, 985–1013

Scales, P. C., Sesma, A., Jr., & Bolstrom, B. (2004). 

     Coming into their own:

     How developmental assets promote positive growth in middle child